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September 21, 2005

Homemade Sentry Gun

Somewhere out there a space marine just messed his pants. This guy built his own working sentry gun using a Airsoft replica[for now] FN P90 BB-gun, a webcam, servos, and an old computer. It detects motion in its field of view, directs you to "freeze" (a la ED-209) and if the target moves in the next 5 seconds it will continuously pelt them with airsoft BBs using both horizontal and vertical targeting. Don't forget to check out the video of his little brother getting pwned.

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September 20, 2005

Coop's Atari Art Blog

The modern day Michelangelo of all things sexy, evil, and slightly chunky, the artist known as Coop is blogging his latest work in progress, including this one with the atari controller. She's a bit thick and orange, but points for the video games right? right? Anyone remember Lords of Acid? mm hmm.

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September 16, 2005

Revolution Controller iz teh SuX0rz wtf?

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought the Nintendo Revolution controller is s0 teh g4y!1!! Video gamers are not the most active people and the idea of holding ones hands at arms length in front of you for hours on end while swinging at stuff and keeping the left hand controller close enough for that 6 inch cable just doesn't sit well. Also there is going to be a flood of mundane life games to take advantage of this gimmick like virtually chopping food (from the promo clip). I could actually chop food for 1/1000th the price of the Revolution AND be able to eat the food when I'm done. And as for the controller skins to play the old Nintendo games, they did the impossible and made it even more uncomfortable than the original NES controller.
Enraged retro cartoon character/22-minute commercial, Captain N, puts it best:

“So I go from carrying a seven inch pistol [NES lightgun] to controlling fucking PowerPoint presentations? You know what? Fuck it. I’m just going to stuff a Virtual Boy in my underwear, start riding a Segway around town and just beg people to beat the shit out of me.”

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A Night at the Cosplay Part II: Sakura Con

Cosplay convention galleries are the flipped over SUV accidents of the internet. You just have to slow down to check it out when you pass. My theory is that the dorkier and more embarassing your hobby is, the more satisfying it has to be to you, otherwise you wouldn't risk money, health, or your chances of ever losing your virginity to do it. Capturing the moment of nerdgasm, these galleries show people at their most self-satisfied, finally able to express who they really are: ninjas, anthropomorphic animals, and schoolgirls.

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September 14, 2005

Card Throwing: A Course in One Part.

Ever wanted to throw playing cards like your favorite cajun X-Man Gambit? First off, I won't tell anyone your totally gay for a comic book hero. Secondly, playing cards do not explode upon impact, at least not without modficiations. Thirdly, you need to decide which kind of grip you'll use to throw, the Hermann, the Scarlet Mustache, the Thurston Method, the Drunken Mermaid, or my favorite grip the Reverse Stranger.

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September 13, 2005

The Geek Hierarchy

The Geek Hierarchy is a chart showing which geeks look down upon other geeks and their relations to all types of geeks. For example, video gamers look down on Role Playing Gamers, who look down on Live-Action Role Playing Gamers, who look down on 13yr olds, who look down on Furries, who look down on Erotic Furries. Or, SciFi Literature fans look down on SciFi TV fans, who look down on Trekkies, who look down on Trekkies that speak Klingon, who look down on Trekkies Who Get Married in Klingon Garb, who look down on Furries, who look down on Erotic Furries. It's all one big geeky pyramid, and the Erotic Furries are ALWAYS on the bottom.

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l33t SCRABBLE T1LEZZ!!1!!1!one

F you grandma! These are Scrabble tiles for my generation! Does your scrabble set lack enough zero tiles to spell out n00b? No @s to write Ph3@R my 5K1LLZ? You've spent years mastering l33t sp34k and pwning n00bs playing counter-strike, so you might as well carry things over to family game night. These Leet Tiles supply the proper Scrabble formated lexicon to be able to tell your sister she is s0 teh suX0rz! lolz

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September 12, 2005

Le Pillow

Le Figure is a humanesque pillow "designed for teenagers" so you know its eXtreem to da' maXX homedawg! Designed by the Swedish (of course), it is designed not only to be used as furniture.

It can be your friend to hug, talk to or dance with, as well as a laid back piece of furniture. The human like shape makes it an interesting graphic element, which gives it a strong presence in any environment. Change the face on Le Figure to make it personal and fit your desires. Print out your idol, loved one or enemy on a transfer film and attach it to the removable velcro face

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September 09, 2005

The Return to Innocence: The Keytar V-1

Lo, and on the 2,191,825th day, the Keytar was created, and it was good.
-Book of Dork 3:16
Keytar Inc.'s William's Keyboard Guitar is, believe it or not, a guitar with a keyboard on it. Different from other keyboard guitars, it's a huge guitar with strings that uses an octave of piano keys to mute the strings into different notes. They are so sure of the Keytar's ultimate domination of live instruments that they have opened a 10,444-square-foot production facility in Arkansas churning out 200 keytars a day retailing for $999 each. Considering the hot demand for these that's a guaranteed $200,000/day ($73 million/year)!!11!1!!one

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Flying Spaghetti Monster: The Religion: The Game

Flying Spaghetti Monsterism is nothing new here at Dorking Out since it's become our official site religion. He [The Flying Spaghetti Monster] created the universe, all evidence pointing towards evolution was intentionally planted by Him. Now you may walk in His steps [except that He flies and has no feet] and touch the unconverted with your noodly appendage. But Stay away from those intelligent-design pushing Kansas school board members! When the time runs out, you'll meet the converted Pastafarians in Heaven next to the Stripper Factory and Beer Volcano.

Posted by maddh at 09:32 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 08, 2005

Steven Seagal's eXtreme Energy Action Power Drink

Former action-star and originator of the Chinese man-dress fashion, Steven Seagal, has formulated his very own energy drink, "Lightning Bolt". The drink includes an expertly blended formula of health supplements such as guarana, ginseng, and goji berries which aid in snapping necks and folding someone's elbow backwards without resorting to guns. The B-vitamins also help you deal with those evil [oil company CEOs/Corrupt Sheriff/Misguided Youth Gangs] who want to [start drilling for oil/Close the Youth Center/Use guns instead of Martial Arts] in your [insert small town/coastal community]. If anyone knows formulas, it's Steven Seagal. Available in Cherry Charge, Root Beer Rush, and Asian Experience[?].

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September 07, 2005

A Night at the Cosplay

Is it BI-MON-SCI-FI-CON already? Not yet, but for now you can check out Dragon Con's cosplay gallery. If you don't know what cosplay is, it's where fans like a character so much, they embarrass themselves and their family in public, but we do not judge at dorkingout, your creepy hobby is safe here. Over 1300 photos of people turning the geek up to 11 (thats just day 1). With more pageantry than a gay pride parade at Carnival[can't make mardi gras references anymore], its obvious what makes these fans truly hardcore. Some are pretty interesting. Some are embarrassing. Some are really dudes. And surprisingly the cute chick to minger ratio isn't half bad. Some of my favorites are The Maxx, Margot from Royal Tenenbaums, C.O.B.R.A., Leeloo, The Crazy 88, and Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Would someone let that stormtrooper know that his mom is waiting to pick him up outside?

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Do-It-Yourself Ergonomic Keyboard

First to answer your questions. Yes, he is wearing a pink shirt, and Yes he did cut a keyboard in half and attach it to his ergo-chair. Master of Ergonomics, Sir Brian Craft, did things the hard way by meticulously separating a $14 keyboard in half, then attaching them by a length of cable so that he can put the 2 parts on the side of his ergonomic kneeling chair (apparently a very natural position for typing). Very clever, but I think the whole computer ergonomics crowd will go a bit too far. In a few years you'll find yourself suspended by hooks from the ceiling over your 3 part keyboard tapping one key at a time with a chopstick held in your mouth, but at least your hands won't get sore.

Bonus: He's also anti-intelligent-design. He gets a gold star!

Posted by maddh at 10:16 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Starship Size Does Matter

Ever want to compare an Imperial Star Destroyer to a Klingon Negh'Var? Or the ships from Starship Troopers to 2001 Space Odyssey, Babylon-5, or Macross? No? Well this guy did it anyways. Jeff Russell's Starship Dimensions compares side-by-side the scales of starships from a few dozen different sci-fi series through 7 different orders of magnitude. Fantastically nerdy stuff. Apparently HALO could eat Borg Cubes like candy.

Posted by maddh at 08:42 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 06, 2005

Science ruins hole digging dreams

Did grandpa or some equivalently old man ever tell you that if you started digging down far enough you'd end up in China? Well he was wrong, very wrong. Should he even survive the crushing heat and pressure of a molten iron core, he'd most likely come out in the Indian Ocean, realizing that his geo-sino-ignorance and lack of science was his ultimate doom. Dig to the Other Side is an implementation of the Google Maps API that allows you to select where you want to start digging down the street level, then chart its location directly on the other side of the globe, indicated by Your hole ends here! This is a creative use of Google Maps and fun for a couple minutes, but I doubt you'll be making it your new homepage.

Posted by maddh at 03:07 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Le Magnifique Micro Métro X-Wing

Time for your daily star wars dose. A very meticulous Frenchman named Hubert has created a miniature X-wing out of used Métro rail tickets. (This will go nicely with the miniature wookie made from body hair clippings) In his forum post he shows you how you can do it in 41 not-so-easy steps. The nice big detailed photos show that he really puts the "metro-" in Métro, look how nice and clean his nails are.

Posted by maddh at 01:25 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Build a frickin' Rail Gun!

In an attempt to further blur the line between games and reality for our impressionable youth, causing them to wreak anarchy on good god fearing americans and push the liberal agenda, William Harriss of gausspistol.com gives us DIY instructions and images on building your own electromagnetic projectile launching gauss pistol. The gauss pistol, while technically not a rail gun (rail gun makes a better title), uses a huge set of capacitors to magnetize coils launching a metal pellet at 78mph (for now). Bring this bad boy to your next Quake-themed paintball match. Before you go around chanting "BOOM HEADSHOT!" be careful not to get corned by n00bs cause the gun needs a wall outlet and 20 seconds to recharge.

Posted by maddh at 11:32 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 02, 2005

PocketMod: The Other Flexible Roll-out Display

If you want flexible roll-out displays but don't want to wait for Phillips to commercialize their technology, we've got a solution for you. The PocketMod is a cheap, simple to use, flexible PDA (actually PAA) that you can make at home, out of paper. In the spirit of the Hipster PDA, PocketMod is the solution for people who realize they don't need a $500 PDA, AC adapter, USB cables, and 2 hours of training to write down appointments and phone numbers. Customize the pocket mod for your needs through the website's interface, and print out your new organizer and use "analog ink" to record things. When its used up, just throw it out and print a new one.

Posted by maddh at 02:11 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Everquest Hurricane Donations

Sony, who runs Everquest, has made a call to EQ2 users to donate to the Red Cross for Hurricane Katrina relief. Similar too their /pizza command, /donate will bring them directly to the Red Cross's donation site. This might be a better use of money than spending real-world cash on a new cloudsong for your L35 orc warrior. The Red Cross might accept copper, gold, or silver, but they definitely don't want your +3 Elven Bag of Holding.

Posted by maddh at 11:52 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Flexible Roll-out Displays - 1 step closer to the promised land

Phillips has developed a prototype display that is able to be rolled out to a face-melting 320x240 2bit grayscale 5" screen. Although we've all been waiting for this for a while, they have no plans to commercialize it just yet. I'm only marginally impressed, call me when they develop the 17" color holographic touch-sensitive wireless internet enabled version of the rollout display. Also it should hover instead of being held.

Posted by maddh at 10:37 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

September 01, 2005

Jump Rope for the Rich and Lonely

Can we have one activity that technology doesn't ruin? Techno-artists Portugaly Orna, Talithman Daphna, and Younger Sharon have created a system that allows children to jump rope, alone, and in a dark windowless room, using $20K in equipment. A virtually projected man (like an actual man would twirl double-dutch?) spins a virtually projected rope across the floor and uses motion capture cameras to ensure you're jumping. Your performance will determine the path of the game's story. The game will not, however, provide counseling to children 15 years later when they discover they can't maintain healthy relationships with non-projected people.

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Epic Battle of the Anachronisms

You know those kids (although 18-30yr olds aren't really considered kids) who dress up like medieval warriors and have mock battles with foam swords on the quad at school? Well I guess they were talking smack to the kids from the other pretend dimensions. In this epic battle I see: Knights, elves, a ninja, Raiden from Mortal Kombat, a wizard, a cowboy, a cardboard giant, and my personal favorite, the fat bald guy wearing the Scottish kilt and throwing ninja stars at the giant. Watch them argue about hitpoints and try to impress that one girl that’s watching them. Pure nerd gold platinum.

Posted by maddh at 10:44 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Princess Leia's Metal Bikini

Star Wars fetishists rejoice. You're all-time favorite thing about the saga (no not Jar-Jar Binks) has its very own fan site. All guys remember (as well as the women who watch Friends) the scene in Return of the Jedi where Leia is wearing the metal bikini. For some it was a wonder of metallurgy and engineering, for some of you it might have even sparked puberty to start. LeiasMetalBikini.com is filled to the brim with detailed scene analysis, tons of fan art, and pages and pages of women (actual women) dressed up in the metal bikini costume. You can find some cute ones in there, but it’s funnier to find the fugs.

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