December 29, 2005

KFED leeching Britney's money, fame, Bandwidth

keywords: trifling

charming young man
If you check out Kevin Federlines totally 2XtReme4U website http://www.kevinfederline.com/ and look into the source code, you can see that the flash intro really comes from http://www.britneyspears.com/kfed/intro.swf so that he wouldn't have to pay for the hosting. hah. don't forget to check out his myspace profile either http://www.myspace.com/kevinfederlineforreal cause its so 'fo real'.

Kev, my wigga, if you need some cheap hosting, try Dreamhost

UPDATE: I've been Defamer-ed!


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October 24, 2005

Queer Eye for the Dictator

keywords: style, dictatorship, moustache

dapper SaddamIs it me, or has being deposed and incarcerated made Saddam one damn good-looking man? Do they have publicly appointed fashion consultants in war-criminal prison? Here are the 4 major improvements I've noticed starting from the top down.

  • No more red beret - Do I really have to explain? Show the world that beautifully thick head of hair now that the lice have been removed.
  • New Beard - I think it works quite well for him, much better than the sorta-gay caterpillar moustache he used to rock.
  • New Suit - The only person to wear epilets and cream isn't his color. His new suit is very modern and tasteful. And the no-tie thing says I'm modern and I don't recognize the authority of this mock trial!
  • Slimmer - A year or two in the joint never hurt anyone. My man Saddam has lost some major weight and looks much healthier overall. Its easy to skip working out when you are running a dictatorship, now he has no excuses.

    The new Saddam really carries more of a sophisticated air about him. Instead of killing women and children you could imagine him at an upscale betting parlor discussing literature over an aged scotch. He's so L.A. I'm waiting to see him pull out his iPod.


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    October 14, 2005

    Updat3

    keywords: laziness, depression, burning sensation

    lotta mercy!Sorry it's been a while since the last post, things have become kinda busy. Plus there just isn't much dork news lately. If this were a gadget site i could just post the 10 to 15 variously branded MP3 players, PDAs and Personal Media players that come out daily but that would be insulting to the readers. Unfornately if I can't make fun of it or say something negative, sarcastic, self depricating, or snarky, I can't post it. I'll pick up again starting next week.
    l4t3rz


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    October 04, 2005

    Middle Earth 2005 Photoshop Contest

    keywords: lotr, office, pure evil

    Trogfegl want Mochaccino, no Latte!TPS reports! Smash! Worth1000.com's latest photoshopping contest (that's right Adobe, I used the term photoshopping incorrectly) is incorporating Lord of the Rings magic and imagery into modern day settings. On a related note, since Dick Cheney controls the world, is rarely visible, and survived like 14 heart attacks, my guess is that he possesses the One Ring.

  • Middle Earth 2005 [via Boing Boing]


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    October 03, 2005

    The Amazing Amalgam of Moustachioed Men

    keywords: moustache rides

    The Praying MantisA right savage 'Tash guvnah! I tried growing my beard out for a month and gave up cause it just ended up making me look like I'm homeless/Kevin Federline. Apparently the secret is a tophat, a monocle, and a lot of wax. Last week the World Beard and Moustache Championships were held in Germany (duh). There are categories for both Solo and Teams in moustaches, goatees, and full beards each with a set of sub-styles. Natural, English, Handlebar, Imperial, or Freestyle, how about best-in-show?

  • World Beard and Moustache Championships [via Sploid]


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    September 26, 2005

    New Opiate of the Masses: Inter-Species Wookie Pr0n

    keywords: wookie, star wars, porn

    thats darth vader's daughter.Sorry about the lack of updates. I have a real world job ($12 monthly ad revenue just doest cut it) that keeps me pretty busy. Also g0tz Id3nt1ty Theft3d! (0h n0es!) So that hasn't been fun. But it's still my responsibility to give the people what they want, Wookie-on-Pricess Star Wars Porn. This one is authentic, but a bit on the soft side. For the harder stuff check out this and this , then confess your sinful interests to PostSercret and pray that God doesn't have a monitoring proxy.

  • chewie loves leia [via Boing Boing]


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    September 21, 2005

    Homemade Sentry Gun

    keywords: sentry, aliens, airsoft

    it's game over man!Somewhere out there a space marine just messed his pants. This guy built his own working sentry gun using a Airsoft replica[for now] FN P90 BB-gun, a webcam, servos, and an old computer. It detects motion in its field of view, directs you to "freeze" (a la ED-209) and if the target moves in the next 5 seconds it will continuously pelt them with airsoft BBs using both horizontal and vertical targeting. Don't forget to check out the video of his little brother getting pwned.

  • Sentry Gun [via hack-a-day]


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    September 20, 2005

    Coop's Atari Art Blog

    keywords: coop, atari, paint

    coopatari.jpg
    The modern day Michelangelo of all things sexy, evil, and slightly chunky, the artist known as Coop is blogging his latest work in progress, including this one with the atari controller. She's a bit thick and orange, but points for the video games right? right? Anyone remember Lords of Acid? mm hmm.

  • Coop's Blog [via Boing Boing]
  • CoopStuff view his archives


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    September 16, 2005

    Revolution Controller iz teh SuX0rz wtf?

    keywords: nintendo, disappointment, despair

    which button pierces my skull with an ice pick?I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought the Nintendo Revolution controller is s0 teh g4y!1!! Video gamers are not the most active people and the idea of holding ones hands at arms length in front of you for hours on end while swinging at stuff and keeping the left hand controller close enough for that 6 inch cable just doesn't sit well. Also there is going to be a flood of mundane life games to take advantage of this gimmick like virtually chopping food (from the promo clip). I could actually chop food for 1/1000th the price of the Revolution AND be able to eat the food when I'm done. And as for the controller skins to play the old Nintendo games, they did the impossible and made it even more uncomfortable than the original NES controller.
    Enraged retro cartoon character/22-minute commercial, Captain N, puts it best:

    “So I go from carrying a seven inch pistol [NES lightgun] to controlling fucking PowerPoint presentations? You know what? Fuck it. I’m just going to stuff a Virtual Boy in my underwear, start riding a Segway around town and just beg people to beat the shit out of me.”
    Besides, it's not the G-Rated game system that should be developing the one-handed controller. [don't pretend you don't know what i'm talking about]
  • Captain N enraged with Nintendo Revolution controller [via Joystiq]


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    A Night at the Cosplay Part II: Sakura Con

    keywords: cosplay, anime, priceless

    ask me about my mother.Cosplay convention galleries are the flipped over SUV accidents of the internet. You just have to slow down to check it out when you pass. My theory is that the dorkier and more embarassing your hobby is, the more satisfying it has to be to you, otherwise you wouldn't risk money, health, or your chances of ever losing your virginity to do it. Capturing the moment of nerdgasm, these galleries show people at their most self-satisfied, finally able to express who they really are: ninjas, anthropomorphic animals, and schoolgirls.

  • Sakura Con
  • Dragon Con
  • "I've got something to tell you Dad" Best-of-Show


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    September 14, 2005

    Card Throwing: A Course in One Part.

    keywords: cards, throwing, the hermann

    drawing my N. DynamiteEver wanted to throw playing cards like your favorite cajun X-Man Gambit? First off, I won't tell anyone your totally gay for a comic book hero. Secondly, playing cards do not explode upon impact, at least not without modficiations. Thirdly, you need to decide which kind of grip you'll use to throw, the Hermann, the Scarlet Mustache, the Thurston Method, the Drunken Mermaid, or my favorite grip the Reverse Stranger.

  • Card Throwing How-To [knifethrowing.info]


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    September 13, 2005

    The Geek Hierarchy

    keywords: geeks, self esteem, furries

    I long for the touch of a human..11010001101001The Geek Hierarchy is a chart showing which geeks look down upon other geeks and their relations to all types of geeks. For example, video gamers look down on Role Playing Gamers, who look down on Live-Action Role Playing Gamers, who look down on 13yr olds, who look down on Furries, who look down on Erotic Furries. Or, SciFi Literature fans look down on SciFi TV fans, who look down on Trekkies, who look down on Trekkies that speak Klingon, who look down on Trekkies Who Get Married in Klingon Garb, who look down on Furries, who look down on Erotic Furries. It's all one big geeky pyramid, and the Erotic Furries are ALWAYS on the bottom.

  • The Geek Hierarchy


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    l33t SCRABBLE T1LEZZ!!1!!1!one

    keywords: leet, scr4bble, gr4nd|\/|4

    j00 R r3+4rd3dF you grandma! These are Scrabble tiles for my generation! Does your scrabble set lack enough zero tiles to spell out n00b? No @s to write Ph3@R my 5K1LLZ? You've spent years mastering l33t sp34k and pwning n00bs playing counter-strike, so you might as well carry things over to family game night. These Leet Tiles supply the proper Scrabble formated lexicon to be able to tell your sister she is s0 teh suX0rz! lolz

  • L33T TILES [via Boing Boing]
  • Wikipedia on Leet
  • Microsoft's Parent's Primer to Computer Slang lolz s0 teh L4me!


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    September 12, 2005

    Le Pillow

    keywords: love, pillow, hate

    tight white clothes not includedLe Figure is a humanesque pillow "designed for teenagers" so you know its eXtreem to da' maXX homedawg! Designed by the Swedish (of course), it is designed not only to be used as furniture.

    It can be your friend to hug, talk to or dance with, as well as a laid back piece of furniture. The human like shape makes it an interesting graphic element, which gives it a strong presence in any environment. Change the face on Le Figure to make it personal and fit your desires. Print out your idol, loved one or enemy on a transfer film and attach it to the removable velcro face
    Then fabricate a crude love hole, and then throw it out when you become too lazy to clean it after your abuse. (don't even pretend you wouldn't)
  • Le Figure [via we make money not art]


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    September 09, 2005

    The Return to Innocence: The Keytar V-1

    keywords: keyboard, guitar, keytarded

    keytardedLo, and on the 2,191,825th day, the Keytar was created, and it was good.
    -Book of Dork 3:16

    Keytar Inc.'s William's Keyboard Guitar is, believe it or not, a guitar with a keyboard on it. Different from other keyboard guitars, it's a huge guitar with strings that uses an octave of piano keys to mute the strings into different notes. They are so sure of the Keytar's ultimate domination of live instruments that they have opened a 10,444-square-foot production facility in Arkansas churning out 200 keytars a day retailing for $999 each. Considering the hot demand for these that's a guaranteed $200,000/day ($73 million/year)!!11!1!!one

  • Music Thing: Look on my Keytar, ye mighty, and despair! [via Engadget]


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    Flying Spaghetti Monster: The Religion: The Game

    keywords: pastafarians, flying spaghetti monsterism, evolution

    Convert them!Flying Spaghetti Monsterism is nothing new here at Dorking Out since it's become our official site religion. He [The Flying Spaghetti Monster] created the universe, all evidence pointing towards evolution was intentionally planted by Him. Now you may walk in His steps [except that He flies and has no feet] and touch the unconverted with your noodly appendage. But Stay away from those intelligent-design pushing Kansas school board members! When the time runs out, you'll meet the converted Pastafarians in Heaven next to the Stripper Factory and Beer Volcano.

  • Flying Spaghetti Monster: The Game [via Screenhead]


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    September 08, 2005

    Steven Seagal's eXtreme Energy Action Power Drink

    keywords: martial arts, energy drinks, running out of money

    do you trust me?Former action-star and originator of the Chinese man-dress fashion, Steven Seagal, has formulated his very own energy drink, "Lightning Bolt". The drink includes an expertly blended formula of health supplements such as guarana, ginseng, and goji berries which aid in snapping necks and folding someone's elbow backwards without resorting to guns. The B-vitamins also help you deal with those evil [oil company CEOs/Corrupt Sheriff/Misguided Youth Gangs] who want to [start drilling for oil/Close the Youth Center/Use guns instead of Martial Arts] in your [insert small town/coastal community]. If anyone knows formulas, it's Steven Seagal. Available in Cherry Charge, Root Beer Rush, and Asian Experience[?].

  • Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt[thanks torquil]


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    September 07, 2005

    A Night at the Cosplay

    keywords: costumes, exhibitionists, grown men dressing like sailor moon

    Dad, I have something to tell youIs it BI-MON-SCI-FI-CON already? Not yet, but for now you can check out Dragon Con's cosplay gallery. If you don't know what cosplay is, it's where fans like a character so much, they embarrass themselves and their family in public, but we do not judge at dorkingout, your creepy hobby is safe here. Over 1300 photos of people turning the geek up to 11 (thats just day 1). With more pageantry than a gay pride parade at Carnival[can't make mardi gras references anymore], its obvious what makes these fans truly hardcore. Some are pretty interesting. Some are embarrassing. Some are really dudes. And surprisingly the cute chick to minger ratio isn't half bad. Some of my favorites are The Maxx, Margot from Royal Tenenbaums, C.O.B.R.A., Leeloo, The Crazy 88, and Carl from Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Would someone let that stormtrooper know that his mom is waiting to pick him up outside?

  • Dragon-Con 2005 [via YesButNoButYes]


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    Do-It-Yourself Ergonomic Keyboard

    keywords: DIY, keyboard, ponytails

    someone buy this man a ms natural kbFirst to answer your questions. Yes, he is wearing a pink shirt, and Yes he did cut a keyboard in half and attach it to his ergo-chair. Master of Ergonomics, Sir Brian Craft, did things the hard way by meticulously separating a $14 keyboard in half, then attaching them by a length of cable so that he can put the 2 parts on the side of his ergonomic kneeling chair (apparently a very natural position for typing). Very clever, but I think the whole computer ergonomics crowd will go a bit too far. In a few years you'll find yourself suspended by hooks from the ceiling over your 3 part keyboard tapping one key at a time with a chopstick held in your mouth, but at least your hands won't get sore.

  • A $14 "ergo" keyboard from surplus parts

    Bonus: He's also anti-intelligent-design. He gets a gold star!


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    Starship Size Does Matter

    keywords: space stations, starships, envy

    who's got the biggest?Ever want to compare an Imperial Star Destroyer to a Klingon Negh'Var? Or the ships from Starship Troopers to 2001 Space Odyssey, Babylon-5, or Macross? No? Well this guy did it anyways. Jeff Russell's Starship Dimensions compares side-by-side the scales of starships from a few dozen different sci-fi series through 7 different orders of magnitude. Fantastically nerdy stuff. Apparently HALO could eat Borg Cubes like candy.

  • Starship Dimensions


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    September 06, 2005

    Science ruins hole digging dreams

    keywords: china, holes, lies

    damnit!Did grandpa or some equivalently old man ever tell you that if you started digging down far enough you'd end up in China? Well he was wrong, very wrong. Should he even survive the crushing heat and pressure of a molten iron core, he'd most likely come out in the Indian Ocean, realizing that his geo-sino-ignorance and lack of science was his ultimate doom. Dig to the Other Side is an implementation of the Google Maps API that allows you to select where you want to start digging down the street level, then chart its location directly on the other side of the globe, indicated by Your hole ends here! This is a creative use of Google Maps and fun for a couple minutes, but I doubt you'll be making it your new homepage.

  • Dig to the Other Side


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    Le Magnifique Micro Métro X-Wing

    keywords: star wars, le star wars, métro

    deathstar not shownTime for your daily star wars dose. A very meticulous Frenchman named Hubert has created a miniature X-wing out of used Métro rail tickets. (This will go nicely with the miniature wookie made from body hair clippings) In his forum post he shows you how you can do it in 41 not-so-easy steps. The nice big detailed photos show that he really puts the "metro-" in Métro, look how nice and clean his nails are.

  • X-wing en tickets de métro step by step [via Screenhead]


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    Build a frickin' Rail Gun!

    keywords: gauss pistol, DIY, lawsuits

    I'll give you a 1 minute head start starting now.In an attempt to further blur the line between games and reality for our impressionable youth, causing them to wreak anarchy on good god fearing americans and push the liberal agenda, William Harriss of gausspistol.com gives us DIY instructions and images on building your own electromagnetic projectile launching gauss pistol. The gauss pistol, while technically not a rail gun (rail gun makes a better title), uses a huge set of capacitors to magnetize coils launching a metal pellet at 78mph (for now). Bring this bad boy to your next Quake-themed paintball match. Before you go around chanting "BOOM HEADSHOT!" be careful not to get corned by n00bs cause the gun needs a wall outlet and 20 seconds to recharge.

  • Gauss Pistol [via Hack-a-day]


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    September 02, 2005

    PocketMod: The Other Flexible Roll-out Display

    keywords: keep it, simple, stupid

    Y2K compliantIf you want flexible roll-out displays but don't want to wait for Phillips to commercialize their technology, we've got a solution for you. The PocketMod is a cheap, simple to use, flexible PDA (actually PAA) that you can make at home, out of paper. In the spirit of the Hipster PDA, PocketMod is the solution for people who realize they don't need a $500 PDA, AC adapter, USB cables, and 2 hours of training to write down appointments and phone numbers. Customize the pocket mod for your needs through the website's interface, and print out your new organizer and use "analog ink" to record things. When its used up, just throw it out and print a new one.

  • PocketMod


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    Everquest Hurricane Donations

    keywords: everquest, hurricane, bag of holding

    The catacomb of the abyss sends its condolencesSony, who runs Everquest, has made a call to EQ2 users to donate to the Red Cross for Hurricane Katrina relief. Similar too their /pizza command, /donate will bring them directly to the Red Cross's donation site. This might be a better use of money than spending real-world cash on a new cloudsong for your L35 orc warrior. The Red Cross might accept copper, gold, or silver, but they definitely don't want your +3 Elven Bag of Holding.

  • Sony Everquest Site [via Kotaku]
  • Red Cross
  • Direct Relief International


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    Flexible Roll-out Displays - 1 step closer to the promised land

    keywords: roll-out, displays, teasing

    Is that a rollout display in your pocket or...Phillips has developed a prototype display that is able to be rolled out to a face-melting 320x240 2bit grayscale 5" screen. Although we've all been waiting for this for a while, they have no plans to commercialize it just yet. I'm only marginally impressed, call me when they develop the 17" color holographic touch-sensitive wireless internet enabled version of the rollout display. Also it should hover instead of being held.

  • Roll-out screen used in actual e-reader [thanks Ubergizmo]


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    September 01, 2005

    Jump Rope for the Rich and Lonely

    keywords: jump rope, social anxiety

    I wish you were real, projected friend.Can we have one activity that technology doesn't ruin? Techno-artists Portugaly Orna, Talithman Daphna, and Younger Sharon have created a system that allows children to jump rope, alone, and in a dark windowless room, using $20K in equipment. A virtually projected man (like an actual man would twirl double-dutch?) spins a virtually projected rope across the floor and uses motion capture cameras to ensure you're jumping. Your performance will determine the path of the game's story. The game will not, however, provide counseling to children 15 years later when they discover they can't maintain healthy relationships with non-projected people.

  • Jumping Rope text-only [all via We Make Money Not Art]
  • Images
  • Video


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    Epic Battle of the Anachronisms

    keywords: battle, time travel, sewing machines

    Lets get this over with, Babylon 5 is on in 10 minutesYou know those kids (although 18-30yr olds aren't really considered kids) who dress up like medieval warriors and have mock battles with foam swords on the quad at school? Well I guess they were talking smack to the kids from the other pretend dimensions. In this epic battle I see: Knights, elves, a ninja, Raiden from Mortal Kombat, a wizard, a cowboy, a cardboard giant, and my personal favorite, the fat bald guy wearing the Scottish kilt and throwing ninja stars at the giant. Watch them argue about hitpoints and try to impress that one girl that’s watching them. Pure nerd gold platinum.

  • 2v and Friends [thanks torquil]


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    Princess Leia's Metal Bikini

    keywords: star wars, bikinis, dorkgasm

    yowza yowza!Star Wars fetishists rejoice. You're all-time favorite thing about the saga (no not Jar-Jar Binks) has its very own fan site. All guys remember (as well as the women who watch Friends) the scene in Return of the Jedi where Leia is wearing the metal bikini. For some it was a wonder of metallurgy and engineering, for some of you it might have even sparked puberty to start. LeiasMetalBikini.com is filled to the brim with detailed scene analysis, tons of fan art, and pages and pages of women (actual women) dressed up in the metal bikini costume. You can find some cute ones in there, but it’s funnier to find the fugs.

  • Leia's Metal Bikini [thanks torquil]
    sidenote: Honestly what were Jabba and those guys going to do to her? Do you think any of them even had compatible genitalia? The worst that would happen is Jabba would lick her face.


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    August 30, 2005

    My Submission for Neo Orleans

    keywords: Hurricane, New Orleans, Neo Orleans

    First I'd like to say that the events surrounding the hurricane this week were(are) very tragic we don't intend this to make light of the humanitarian situation at all. There is no nice way to say it, but New Orleans is, quite literally, up shit creek without a paddle. Getting straight to the point: They should bail on New Orleans, and build Neo Orleans as a floating megacity on Lake Pontchartrain....

    Read


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    Perry Bible Fellowship

    keywords: bible, unicorns, impale

    unicorn power!
    During my extensive investigation of Square Lake (60 seconds on google) I came across another comic that was kinda in the same vein of sardonic humor, but in a different direction. The Perry Bible Fellowship, written and illustrated by Nicholas Gurewitch, is a collection of dark and twisted humor wrapped in cotton candy. Give it a read, both the writing and the illustrations are top-notch.

  • PBF Archive


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    Floppy disc CD case

    keywords: floppies, CDs, cannibalism

    floppycdcase.jpg disk 1, insert disk 2 to complete imageDo you have stacks and stacks of old 5.25" floppy discs lying around? If you're willing to part with your 1990 archive of alt.bin.scifierotica newsgroup posts (were you gonna hand them down to your children?), you can turn those old disks into cool retro CD cases. Just slice down one of the edges, gut the ferro-magnetic goodness inside, and insert CD. Then impress anyone born before 1980.

  • Make Blog [via Boing Boing]


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    WTF Japan: Making handmade CD players in school

    keywords: japan, CDs, hover-domes

    the RIAA gets lazier and lazierA group of 4th graders in Japan who attended Sony's ExploraScience event were able to create working homemade (and hand cranked) CD players as they learn about basics of its digital signal technology. They were provided simple optical sensors to read paper cutouts that had different notes encoded in face-melting 3-bit audio (enough for 8 notes). <rant> This is what's wrong with America. Over there they are teaching kids how to understand technology and science, but over here we are replacing biology books with bibles. In 20 years Japan will be in its protective orbital hover-dome looking down on us as we Americans sacrifice virgins to please the sun, ensuring it will rise the next day. </rant> I guess we shall always look to Japan for a glimpse of the future (actually it's already wednesday there).

  • Handmade CD Player Workshop (in japanese)
  • via Engadget (in english thank you)


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    August 29, 2005

    Space Lab Van

    keywords: suspcious, windowsless, white, van

    Get in the van!This one's totally dorking out material, but I'll just let the quotes do the talking:

    Here are photos of my uncle's van, in which he installed a couple Skylab simulator panels as well as a computer and other strangeness to complete the look of a space-van-craft circa 1975.
    It's also the last thing you'll see before a jogger finds your body in a forest preserve.
  • Uncle's Space Van [via Boing Boing]


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    Square Lake is the bees knees

    keywords: square lake, comics, child abuse

    square lake
    Square Lake was a comic written and illustrated by Dan Acton that ran in the one of the University of Illinois student papers a few years back. The paper's website recently deleted the archive, but fortunately it was saved by the kbps blog. I had a couple classes with this guy, top-shelf fellow. The comic has some seriously dark humour. It's sort of like a 1930's Bazooka Joe gum wrapper comic that was regularly beaten as a child and forced to wear a skirt to school. Check out the archive.

  • Square Lake Vault [via kbps]


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    Dignity, thy name is Atari Buckle

    keywords: Atari 2600, belts, pride

    a strap-on for nerdsYeah that's right, they went there. From the makers of the NES Buckle, comes the Atari Buckle. It's basically an Atari 2600 controller on a belt, and thats it. Wear this baby on a crowded subway and show women your smooth 2.5inch nub. Also be prepared to answer "Why does your belt buckle look like a penis?" like every 10 minutes. Atari 2600 Joystick Belt: $65, Stormtrooper Helmet: $75, knocking over the espresso of the only girl who would talk to you with with your black plastic belt-on phallis: priceless.

  • Atari Buckle [via Gizmodo]


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    August 26, 2005

    Colonel Sanders is rolling in his grave

    keywords: chicken, white meat, new packing material

    now everything else tastes like chicken, except chickenIs it because gas has hit $3.09 here? possibly.. But it's also because a scientist has developed a way to make chicken entirely white meat. It's not as advanced as it sounds, but the process shreds dark meat into a liquid which is then put into a centrifuge. The centrifuge separates the mush into layers of water, fat, and extracted meat essence. The extracted part can then be pumped into molds to become tofu-like "white meat" (in that its no longer dark in color). People say it tastes bland and unappetizing, but what did you think, it was gonna taste better after all that?

  • Playing chicken: No more dark meat [MSNBC]


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    NES Duck Hunt Sniper Rifle

    keywords: duck hunt, sniper, clock towers

    Bam! Headshot!This is a great home made mod (with DIY instructions) on transforming the old NES light gun into a bad ass Sniper Rifle. Finally, my two favorite hobbies combined. Based off a converted air-soft rifle, this guy used a little electronics knowhow to keep everything functional including the trigger. One shot, one kill will be your creed as you pick off ducks and clay pigeons from distances of up to 6 feet (the controller cord is still the original length). It may not improve your game but that damn dog will think twice about laughing when you miss.

  • Project Duck Hunt Sniper Rifle [via Gizmodo]


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    1930 Catalog of Fraternal Haberdashery

    keywords: fraternal orders, secret societies, confused sexuality

    brotherhoodWhether you belong to the Masons, Anti-Masons, Skull and Bones, The Illuminati, NO MA'AM, or the Knights of the One True and Excruciated Flying Spaghetti Monster, your secret society needs amusing and humiliating products for initiations, punishments, and entertainment. (You don't think they spend the entire day controlling world politics do you?) Check out the De Moulin Bros & Co. "Burlesque and Side Degree Specialties, Paraphernalia and Costumes" published in 1930. This isn't some college frat "oil check & atomic sit-up" hazing, these are some serious prank/torture devices, guaranteed to create loyalty to your organization. Some items of interest are: Six types of goats, The No-Man's Land, The Striking Maul and Greased Pole, Jewish and Swiss Naval Battle, Big Busy Bertha, and Pillow Fight.

  • De Moulin Catalog [via wemakemoneynotart]


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    Playboy joins the Interweb Super-Info-Highway

    keywords: playboy, internet, anachronisms

    damn 1200kps modem!Playboy is planning to release a digital web version of their magazine to deliver you even more ads while you're reading in-depth articles about politics in Iraq and catching swordfish in the Caribbean, oh yeah and the 8 out of 120 pages that actually contain nudity. So Hef's big new idea is to offer pornography over the internet huh? Way to stay on top of the trends. Should I send him a Hootie and the Blowfish CD and some parachute pants (burgundy silk of course). Maybe I could tell him how the OJ Simpson trial ends?

  • Playboy goes digital [CNN]


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    August 25, 2005

    End of the World Photoshopped

    keywords: photoshop, apocalypse, geocide

    Damnit Bloomberg!!!Oh no, it’s the end of the world! They must have finally legalized same-sex marriages, right? Not really, photoshopping competition site Worth1000.com's completed contest of the day is Mass Destruction. There are 25 entries depicting the end of the world and in true Hollywood fashion, its the recognizable cultural landmarks that are the first to be destroyed. (That poor Empire State Building has been blown up so many different times over the years) On the topic of destroying the earth, check out Geocide on no less than 11 realistic ways that the earth can be obliterated including the physics, timeline, resources, and odds of success for each way. A must for aspiring mad-scientists.

  • Mass Destruction [via Boing Boing]
  • Geocide


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    The Sims present R. Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet"

    keywords: r-kelly, Sims, virtual insanity

    he still taped himself peeing on a 14yr old girl who he paid her mother to have sex withFor those of you not familiar with "Trapped in the Closet", it's R-Kelly's latest opus where he does the same song 5 different times and sing-describes every minute action of a love triangle drama. For those you not familiar with Machinima, it's a form of media using 3D videogame engines to create and direct scripted movies. Where these two converge is Kendra Flemons's recreations of all 5 chapters of Trapped in the Closet using the Sims engine. Do to some limitations though, there are no guns, sex is replaced with hugging, and bad acting is replaced with great 3D animations.

  • Gamers Remodel R. Kelly's 'Closet' [via Joystiq]
  • Part 1 of 5
  • Part 2 of 5
  • Part 3 of 5
  • Part 4 of 5
  • Part 5 of 5


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    Intelligent Design Illustrated

    keywords: evolution, those left behind by evolution

    facts are meaningless, you could use facts to prove anything thats even remotely trueFor those of you worried by our secular-leftist liberal-atheist terrorist-femocratic education system teaching the so called "scientific theory" to our impressionable youth, don't worry. The true American patriots are working hard to get more of the one true vengeful God into your children's science classes. If you've noticed the huge gaping cavernous holes in the logic of the Intelligent Design Theory, the angels at Don't Drink The Koolaid have a nice illustrated breakdown with explainations to clear up these contradictions for us so we can go back to our monster truck rallies and disapproving of Will and Grace.

  • This Might Explain A Few Things [via Screenhead]
  • Flying Spaghetti Monsterism
    btw the ads to the right might be pro-Intelligent Design based on the content of this post, so don't support them, go here instead FSM!


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    August 24, 2005

    Top 10: Black Metal Promo Shots

    keywords: black metal, shin gaurds, face paint

    Can I get 8 Wallet-Sized prints also?Remember that chunky kid in your highschool named Steve? He'd occationally shave off his eyebrows, tried to grow a faustian goatee 5 or 6 chin-hairs at a time, and only started wearing a black trenchcoat AFTER Columbine. Well he's in a black-metal band now, and black-metal bands need promotional photos to let you know how down with satan they are. Compiled here in this most dark tome, written in blood, bound in human skin, is the Top 10 Most Ridiculous Black Metal Pics of All Time. I feel better about myself already.

  • Top 10 Most Ridiculous Black Metal Pics of All Time


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    This issue of Duh Magazine: Movies Suck Now

    keywords: movies, ashton kootcher

    i wanna bash rob schneider tooKing Snarky of Sarcastalot, Defamer, has a post about a NYTimes article (use BugMeNot to avoid registering) about how Hollywood execs are admitting that the reason for supposed "low earnings" may be because of their product, and possibly not their previous reasons of file sharing and terrorism. "Audiences have gotten smart to the marketing, and they can smell the good ones from the bad ones at a distance." Well there is that, but lets not forget: ever rising ticket prices, the price of theater snacks, the 30 minutes of commercials before the previews, the commercials that trick you to thinking its a preview, the movies that are actually 30% commercials and product placement, the 1/4th of seats in a theater that are at an unviewable angle that you have to sit in cause you didn't come 1 hour early, the $8 parking, the people who bring babies, the people who translate dialog in realtime to non-english relatives, and the re-makes, sweet jesus the re-makes. Can someone remind me again why I'm not pouring my money into this industry?

  • Hollywood sees fizzle [via Defamer]


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    Google Talk: A Constructive Criticism

    keywords: Google Talk

    Believe it, trick!Google Talk beta is Google's foray into the instant messenger world. Using a Jabber server of their own, they are attempting to popularize an open standard that hopefully the other clients (AOL, MSN, YAHOO) will one day follow, allowing the same interoperability that email enjoys. Although officially announced Wednesday, late Tuesday I found a link to the Google Talk download page a day early and decided to take the Google Talk beta for a spin to see what it's all about. I was able to get 2 other friends already on GMail to chat with me over the new client to see it in action. While I found a lot of things I liked, there were still many problems I see that might prevent this client from taking off at this point.

    Read


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    August 23, 2005

    3D tactile feedback using air

    keywords: japan, 3D, air hockey

    airfeedback.jpgDorkingout field correspondent Torquil has submitted this link for perusal. The scienticians at the NTT Cyber Communications Laboratory Group in Japan have created an unteathered 3D force feedback device using grids of tiny individually controlled air holes in the surface of the table. It simulates the height or contact of a 3D object by adjusting the air pressure towards a pointing wand with an air scoop at the end. Before you ask, yes this may be used in the distant future to have cyber sex with your computer. However in the meantime I expect a few of the "Do It Yourself" inventor crowd to get caught by their mothers humping the airhockey table. "Its a prototype!"

  • Untethered Force Feedback Interface


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    Galerie du Robocop

    keywords: robocop, art, appreciation

    what is this love you speak of? does not computeAn anonymous artist named Egg has made a bunch of Robocop themed works using a flash based art program Artpad. His masterpieces have been collected in The Museum of Modern Robocop Art. Fantastic stuff except that there isn't any ED-209 action. Remember when Robocop killed the dad from That 70's Show?
    Real quickly, some quotes:
    RoboCop: Dead or alive, you're coming with me!
    ED-209: Please put down your weapon. You have 20 seconds to comply.
    Clarence: Bitches leave!
    Bixby Snyder: I'd buy that for a dollar!

  • Museum of Modern Robocop Art [via Screenhead]


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    Cool a Guinness to 2°C with a jet engine

    keywords: beer, jet engines, homeowner-insurance

    dats jus frivalusThis article isn't new but Hackaday dug it up and it fits in with my interests. This guy in New Zealand wants to cool down his Guinness (you must capitalize it) as fast as possible and possibly die while doing it. The theory is that when a compressed gas expands from liquid to gas it draws a lot of heat energy out with it, cooling down the surroundings. He plans to release an entire tank of propane in a few short minutes, but instead of just dangerously releasing the gas into his garage, he's dangerously burning it off with a jet engine made out of a car's turbo turbine. Me? I would have just used a refrigerator, but no one would want to read about that.

  • Jet powered beer cooler [via Hackaday]


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    ENGADGET  198...... NO CARRIER

    keywords: BBS(s), Remember the 80's?

    the SysOp is [In]If you're old enought to remember Upload/Download ratios, ASCII art, and callback verifiers, you'll love Engadget's little Engadget 1985 special. (If you have no idea what those are Learn some history! (and stay in school (and say no to drugs))). Done in the style of the BBS systems of old, it has monospaced type, 16 color images, suitcase sized cellphones, floppy disk drives, it's perfect! Can you remember the excitement of your favorite bbs getting a second line with a 19.2Kb modem? Pirating the non-shareware version of Wolfenstein3D? Boot disks? Ascii pr0n? Those were the days.

  • Engadget 1985
  • Wikipedia's BBS entry


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